Showing posts with label be yourself. Show all posts
Showing posts with label be yourself. Show all posts

3.24.2014

10 Things I'd tell my Teenage Self



We all make faux-pas as teenagers. Between the ravages of acne, bad fashion choices, and endless extra-curriculars, adolescence can feel more like a battlefield as opposed to a walk in the park. Armed with the wisdom of age (haha, I wish) or at least the lessons of experience, here's 10 things I'd tell my teenage self, beginning with the most superficial.


1. Whatever fashion thing you think looks great probably doesn't. 

In fact, you will look back upon the clothes of high school as either disgustingly comfortable or hopeless teenybopper attempts at sexy dressing. If you are struck by the urge to wear the same hoodie every day or to show as much cleavage as humanly possible in a tank-top, please resist this urge. While shielding yourself with outerwear aka wearing a coat may not be "cool", having a compromised immune system isn't either.

2. Learn what haircut looks good on you and stick to it. Even if it's not the coolest. Or what everybody else does. Your later self will thank you. 

Nothing is worse than a cringe-inducing adolescent school photo. In high school, I was determined to grow my hair as long as possible and then part in in the middle. Blame it on Avril Lavigne. Not only did I look like hippie, it did no favors for my face. I now know that anything past the shoulders tends to hang limp and flat next to my head. And pixie cuts really do look the best of them all. Now if only I could tell 16-year-old me. 

3. Find an activity out of your comfort zone and pursue it whole-heartedly.

The summer before freshman year, my parents informed me that I would need to choose a sport to play. The thought of interacting with teammates and doing something athletic petrified me. After much urging, I chose to join the cross country team. It allowed me perform as an individual and required little coordination. Four years later, I walked (ran) away with a lifelong love for distance running, some great friends, and many 5K's under my belt. While it was scary at first, dedicating myself to something challenging helped change my perspective on other obstacles in my life.

4. Being a nerd is okay, and even cool. It just means you're passionate about things.

While the word "nerd" or even "overachiever" was often spoken with disdain in the halls of my high school, I hadn't yet seen through this BS. Who knew all the nerds would grow into gainfully-employed hipsters with excellent Instagrams? That uncool would become the new cool? Embrace your passions, your talents, your "nerdiness" and run with it.

5. Go stag to a school dance. And be okay with it.

While not having a date to the dance may feel like the end of the world, do not obsess about it. I went stag to my senior prom and couldn't have had a better time. Pre-dance, I felt left out and unwanted. Looking back, I'm so glad I did it. I danced all night with my friends and didn't have to worry about the nervousness or awkwardness of a date. Confidence is sexy.

6. Practice time management skills now. 

I have never been as busy as I was in high school. Seven classes, juggling extracurriculars, sports practices, hanging out with friends...it's enough to give a girl a headache. High school is where I cut my teeth time-management-wise. I learned what methods work for me personally and still fall back on these tricks today.

7. Take note of the subjects you love.

I was convinced that I wanted to be a trauma surgeon in high school. I excelled at math and science, loved ER, and knew doctors made a lot of money. It was no brainer. However, history was undoubtedly my favorite subject. Later in undergrad, I discovered there were several occupations for people who loved history; one of them was called an archaeologist. Go figure.

8. Save your money.

Being in college and your early-20s costs money. Sometimes more than you think. With student loans on top of first apartments, things begin to add up. Save your money now. Work a job in the summer. Save your birthday money. At the very least it will pay for take-out or contribute to your spring break fund.

9. Cherish your family.

When you're a teenager, your family and especially your parents can drive you batty. You will miss them. The first eighteen years of your life are likely the only time you will see your family members daily and play a significant role in the day-to-day functioning of the household. Give them some attention, listen to their advice, accept their love.

10. Don't take everything so seriously, including yourself.

Many things that happen as a teenager can seem like the end of the world. This is not even a season of your life. You will laugh about many things later or reflect back on some painful lesson learned. You might think you know it all, but trust me kid, you've got a long way to go.


1.15.2014

Wisdom Wednesday: New Year's Manifesto

Happy Wednesday! With Wednesday comes the inevitable "hump day" blues, sense of disillusionment, exhaustion, and longing for the weekend. Like a good shot of espresso, an inspiring quote or piece of writing can often inspire and perk me up, ready to take on what the rest of the day and week holds. Each Wednesday here on notsosimplestyle features a few bits of wisdom on varying topics, in the hopes you may find humor, inspiration, solace and affirmation.

Rather than quotes this Wednesday, I wanted to address the whole concept of New Year's Resolutions. While we are now a solid fifteen days into the New Year and I should probably have my resolutions in hand and be on the way to executing them, I'm working on putting less pressure on myself. I guess we could call that a resolution. Too often, we assign the new year tantamount importance, capitalize it, literally and figuratively. We see it as a complete clean-slate, rather than the chance to build upon what came before, with the day itself a marking in an on-going cycle. 

In years past, I've made resolutions and kept them with varying success. This year, the urge to scribble down a list of things like "go to the gym more", "be less surly in the mornings", "learn flamenco dancing" was decidedly lacking. Although I have vowed to complete concrete tasks in the past, I always feel like I am missing the big picture. Going to the gym in not just about tightening your buns and losing the spare tire for swimsuit season; it's about self-discipline and having a long-term plan. Saying that you will call your mom x-number of times per week or have weekly brunch with your friends is not about eggs benedict or adult-child guilt; it's about relationships, giving, and communication. 

Picking easily-accomplishable, can-be-checked-off-a-to-do-list items is great. It breaks up goals, aspirations, and dreams into smaller, bite-sized snacks. But this year I want to dream big. I want to aspire to the large goals like determination, patience, and self-love. I want to examine situations throughout the year through these lenses, finding opportunities for smaller wins while ultimately working towards a larger, more nebulous goal. With that in mind, I have written something different. My list is more of a manifesto, a mission statement; something to aspire for all years, not just 2014. Because at the end of the day, life is not about eating more kale, it's about becoming who you were meant to be.

This I Vow…

I vow to fiercely love myself in all my forms, to embrace and accept the sadness, shame, pain and outrage, knowing they are only one side of the coin.

I vow always to keep my heart open, to give and receive love, ordinary and extraordinary.

I vow to pursue my dreams fearlessly, to walk a path of twists and turns with patience, courage, and self-understanding.

I vow to not be an island, but accept the help and love of others, as freely as waves upon the beach, while knowing there are some things I must face alone.

I vow to always learn and be curious, to be passionate, creative, and unapologetically genuine.

I vow to live a life bigger than the one I imagine, always knowing that God has plans, even when I can't see.

I vow to be myself and take my rightful place in the world, knowing that each day and moment moves me towards my ever-growing destiny.


9.18.2013

Wisdom Wednesday: Be Yourself

While we normally share some pearls of wisdom every Wednesday here on notsosimplestyle, sometimes life gets in the way of writing and posting. The past week here in New York has been really busy with two old friends coming into town and plenty of fun with new friends as well.

I find myself becoming more comfortable here as time goes by. While I expected to eventually get into the rhythm of the "big city", I did not expect to adapt so quickly. Maybe my experience studying abroad in Rome has helped me to adjust, or maybe I'm just a New Yorker at heart! Regardless, I enjoyed playing tour guide for my visiting friends.

This week is all about individuality and finding your voice. As I continue further down the blogging path, I check myself to make sure the content I'm creating is a reflection of my style. Other than fashion, I have a passion for quotes (obviously) and photography, interests I have tried to incorporate here. The blogs I love the most display a strong personal voice writing-wise, and genuinely reflect the style and life of the person creating them. With that said, go forth and blog yourself!


If I am not for myself, who will be?
                   ~ Pirke Avot


My great mistake, the fault for which I can't forgive myself, is that one day I ceased my obstinate pursuit of my own individuality.
                    ~ Oscar Wilde


In our society, the ideal self is bold, gregarious, and comfortable in the spotlight. We like to think that we value individuality, but mostly we admire the type of individual who's comfortable 'putting himself out there.'
                     ~ Susan Cain


To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.
                      ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson


Be yourself. Unapologetically.
                      ~ Kesha


It is the business of the very few to be independent; it is a privilege of the strong. And whoever attempts it, even with the best right, but without being OBLIGED to do so, proves that he is probably not only strong, but also daring beyond measure.
                       ~ Friedrich Nietzsche


I think the reward for conformity is that everyone likes you except yourself.
                        ~ Rita Mae Brown


In order to be irreplaceable, one must always be different.
                         ~ Coco Chanel


If everyone is thinking alike, then no one is thinking.
                         ~ Benjamin Franklin


Two roads diverged in a wood, and I - I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.
                          ~ Robert Frost