10 Things I'd tell my Teenage Self

We all make faux-pas as teenagers. Between the ravages of acne, bad fashion choices, and endless extra-curriculars, adolescence can feel more like a battlefield as opposed to a walk in the park. Armed with the wisdom of age (haha, I wish) or at least the lessons of experience, here's 10 things I'd tell my teenage self, beginning with the most superficial.

1. Whatever fashion thing you think looks great probably doesn't. 

In fact, you will look back upon the clothes of high school as either disgustingly comfortable or hopeless teenybopper attempts at sexy dressing. If you are struck by the urge to wear the same hoodie every day or to show as much cleavage as humanly possible in a tank-top, please resist this urge. While shielding yourself with outerwear aka wearing a coat may not be "cool", having a compromised immune system isn't either.

2. Learn what haircut looks good on you and stick to it. Even if it's not the coolest. Or what everybody else does. Your later self will thank you. 

Nothing is worse than a cringe-inducing adolescent school photo. In high school, I was determined to grow my hair as long as possible and then part in in the middle. Blame it on Avril Lavigne. Not only did I look like hippie, it did no favors for my face. I now know that anything past the shoulders tends to hang limp and flat next to my head. And pixie cuts really do look the best of them all. Now if only I could tell 16-year-old me. 

3. Find an activity out of your comfort zone and pursue it whole-heartedly.

The summer before freshman year, my parents informed me that I would need to choose a sport to play. The thought of interacting with teammates and doing something athletic petrified me. After much urging, I chose to join the cross country team. It allowed me perform as an individual and required little coordination. Four years later, I walked (ran) away with a lifelong love for distance running, some great friends, and many 5K's under my belt. While it was scary at first, dedicating myself to something challenging helped change my perspective on other obstacles in my life.

4. Being a nerd is okay, and even cool. It just means you're passionate about things.

While the word "nerd" or even "overachiever" was often spoken with disdain in the halls of my high school, I hadn't yet seen through this BS. Who knew all the nerds would grow into gainfully-employed hipsters with excellent Instagrams? That uncool would become the new cool? Embrace your passions, your talents, your "nerdiness" and run with it.

5. Go stag to a school dance. And be okay with it.

While not having a date to the dance may feel like the end of the world, do not obsess about it. I went stag to my senior prom and couldn't have had a better time. Pre-dance, I felt left out and unwanted. Looking back, I'm so glad I did it. I danced all night with my friends and didn't have to worry about the nervousness or awkwardness of a date. Confidence is sexy.

6. Practice time management skills now. 

I have never been as busy as I was in high school. Seven classes, juggling extracurriculars, sports practices, hanging out with friends...it's enough to give a girl a headache. High school is where I cut my teeth time-management-wise. I learned what methods work for me personally and still fall back on these tricks today.

7. Take note of the subjects you love.

I was convinced that I wanted to be a trauma surgeon in high school. I excelled at math and science, loved ER, and knew doctors made a lot of money. It was no brainer. However, history was undoubtedly my favorite subject. Later in undergrad, I discovered there were several occupations for people who loved history; one of them was called an archaeologist. Go figure.

8. Save your money.

Being in college and your early-20s costs money. Sometimes more than you think. With student loans on top of first apartments, things begin to add up. Save your money now. Work a job in the summer. Save your birthday money. At the very least it will pay for take-out or contribute to your spring break fund.

9. Cherish your family.

When you're a teenager, your family and especially your parents can drive you batty. You will miss them. The first eighteen years of your life are likely the only time you will see your family members daily and play a significant role in the day-to-day functioning of the household. Give them some attention, listen to their advice, accept their love.

10. Don't take everything so seriously, including yourself.

Many things that happen as a teenager can seem like the end of the world. This is not even a season of your life. You will laugh about many things later or reflect back on some painful lesson learned. You might think you know it all, but trust me kid, you've got a long way to go.

The Island in Time

Ocean is more ancient than the mountains, and freighted with the memories and the dreams of Time.

            ~ H.P. Lovecraft

Last time I went to St. Catherines, I thought it was a once-in-a-lifetime occurrence. Little did I know that I would be returning only a few months later. Experiencing the island in the winter added a new layer to my understanding of the place and my own love for it. The beaches are more desolate, the weather more harrowing, but the beauty remains undimmed. 

Made some lemur friends along the way, sat on the dock, saw some gorgeous sunsets, went on some great walks, and enjoyed myself more than ever.

Wisdom Wednesday: Risk and Chances

Sometimes life is about well-laid plans but other times it's about taking chances. Risks are a double-edged sword, a great wager with a great reward. The life you've been given only comes once and sometimes a leap of faith must be made. I've been thinking a lot about risks the last few days. I worry about whether I'll ever make money as an archaeologist. I worry about finding a job after my internship. I worry about whether to apply to this field school or this job there or that job there. Sometimes my life feels like one big set of dominoes. One small risk taken, without proper planning and the whole thing comes crashing down. In the end, I drive myself crazy pondering the what-ifs and worst-case scenarios. Even with my best laid plans, a large amount of belief and determination is required. While this is a day early, as I stay busy pondering risks and chances of my own, here's some quotes about making a leap of faith.


You get as many chances as you want; as many as you dare to make for yourself.
~ Edward Bloor

If you are not willing to risk the unusual, you will have to settle for the ordinary.
~ Jim Rohn

Fear stifles our thinking and actions. It creates indecisiveness that results in stagnation. I have known talented people who procrastinate indefinitely rather than risk failure. Lost opportunities cause erosion of confidence, and the downward spiral begins.
~ Charles Stanley

It is better to risk starving to death then surrender. If you give up on your dreams, what's left?
~ Jim Carrey


Living at risk is jumping off the cliff and building your wings on the way down.
~ Ray Bradbury

During the first period of a man's life the greatest danger is not to take the risk.
 ~ Soren Kierkegaard

People have to really suffer before they can risk doing what they love.
~ Chuck Palahniuk

It seems to be a law of nature, inflexible and inexorable, that those who will not risk cannot win.
~ John Paul Jones

There are one hundred men seeking security to one able man who is willing to risk his fortune.
~ J. Paul Getty

Often the difference between a successful person and a failure is not one has better abilities or ideas, but the courage that one has to bet on one's ideas, to take a calculated risk - and to act.
~ Andre Malraux

Wisdom Wednesday: New Year's Manifesto

Happy Wednesday! With Wednesday comes the inevitable "hump day" blues, sense of disillusionment, exhaustion, and longing for the weekend. Like a good shot of espresso, an inspiring quote or piece of writing can often inspire and perk me up, ready to take on what the rest of the day and week holds. Each Wednesday here on notsosimplestyle features a few bits of wisdom on varying topics, in the hopes you may find humor, inspiration, solace and affirmation.

Rather than quotes this Wednesday, I wanted to address the whole concept of New Year's Resolutions. While we are now a solid fifteen days into the New Year and I should probably have my resolutions in hand and be on the way to executing them, I'm working on putting less pressure on myself. I guess we could call that a resolution. Too often, we assign the new year tantamount importance, capitalize it, literally and figuratively. We see it as a complete clean-slate, rather than the chance to build upon what came before, with the day itself a marking in an on-going cycle. 

In years past, I've made resolutions and kept them with varying success. This year, the urge to scribble down a list of things like "go to the gym more", "be less surly in the mornings", "learn flamenco dancing" was decidedly lacking. Although I have vowed to complete concrete tasks in the past, I always feel like I am missing the big picture. Going to the gym in not just about tightening your buns and losing the spare tire for swimsuit season; it's about self-discipline and having a long-term plan. Saying that you will call your mom x-number of times per week or have weekly brunch with your friends is not about eggs benedict or adult-child guilt; it's about relationships, giving, and communication. 

Picking easily-accomplishable, can-be-checked-off-a-to-do-list items is great. It breaks up goals, aspirations, and dreams into smaller, bite-sized snacks. But this year I want to dream big. I want to aspire to the large goals like determination, patience, and self-love. I want to examine situations throughout the year through these lenses, finding opportunities for smaller wins while ultimately working towards a larger, more nebulous goal. With that in mind, I have written something different. My list is more of a manifesto, a mission statement; something to aspire for all years, not just 2014. Because at the end of the day, life is not about eating more kale, it's about becoming who you were meant to be.

This I Vow…

I vow to fiercely love myself in all my forms, to embrace and accept the sadness, shame, pain and outrage, knowing they are only one side of the coin.

I vow always to keep my heart open, to give and receive love, ordinary and extraordinary.

I vow to pursue my dreams fearlessly, to walk a path of twists and turns with patience, courage, and self-understanding.

I vow to not be an island, but accept the help and love of others, as freely as waves upon the beach, while knowing there are some things I must face alone.

I vow to always learn and be curious, to be passionate, creative, and unapologetically genuine.

I vow to live a life bigger than the one I imagine, always knowing that God has plans, even when I can't see.

I vow to be myself and take my rightful place in the world, knowing that each day and moment moves me towards my ever-growing destiny.

Colorado Christmas

Hey blog readers! With the new year already well begun, it may seem silly to address Christmas. However, much has happened for me personally in the interim. While I was home for what seemed like a minute, I managed to take some pictures with my new camera (Santa was very kind) before returning to chilly New York, my first New Year's away from home, much moving to be done and a new apartment without internet until yesterday. I'm certainly enjoying my new digs and even braved the hell that is Ikea to order a new bed and dresser. It's my first non-student apartment and I am indulging my slightly more mature decorating tastes that do not revolve around pink and former dorm room items.  It's my second move already while having this blog and I'm gathering experience and patience by the handfuls! My internship has started back up and I'm excited to return to the museum. I'm loving what I'm doing and love all the friends I've made and will continue to make. I also have some exciting things planned for the blog in the coming year.

As far as these pictures go, these were taken Christmas afternoon on a walk with my sister, dad and one of our dogs, Truman. We hiked "The Butte", a very large hill near my parents' house that I used to run with my dad in preparation for the high school cross country season. The top has great views of the front range, downtown and the surrounding area. It was a warm December and I enjoyed the opportunity to get outside while I was home. While I love the city, it doesn't offer the kind of scenery that my Colorado home does.